Dissipating the Hurt from the Past

February 5, 2008

When I meditate, sometimes John is watching TV in the other room.  The woofer on the sound system sounds like a sonic boom going through the house.

If I get annoyed at the sound making my head vibrate I lose my ability to calm my mind.  I find myself getting stressed out.

I discovered that if I allow the sounds of the TV to enter my mind and take them with an attitude of “John is doing something he enjoys.  The house has life in it.  Sid my terrier is probably cuddling with him”, then I can dissipate any emotions that I attach to it, and before I know it I’m meditating and completely unaware of the shaking of the house.

I was thinking about this this morning as I reflected on my past.  I was wondering where to go with what I’ve written — things about my father, my time in Florida, my suicide attempts.  What do I do with this information now that it’s surfaced into my consciousness and has become part of my superficial existence?

And then I wondered if this is similar to the TV and the meditating.  Take it, be with it, allow it.  Don’t struggle to suppress it or deny it.  Incorporate it.  Embrace it so completely that it becomes a part of my structure.  And make sure the rest of my being is strong enough that this knowledge doesn’t become the totality of who I am, but just another jigsaw in the entire picture of me.

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One Response to “Dissipating the Hurt from the Past”

  1. lirone said

    I do yoga in a room right next to a gym where people do weightlifting to the accompaniment of loud pounding music. During the relaxation my yoga teacher gently tells us to use the music as a reminder to come back to focussing on the breath. Amazingly helpful way of reframing a distraction – I imagine the music as the modern equivalent of temple bells!

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